So many of us are attracted to the beautiful images we see of traditional chinese weddings, so why not learn more about these gorgeous traditions? Next stop on the NK Bride “Weddings Around the World” is China! The Chinese culture includes so many traditions that a traditional ceremony can last up to three days if all the traditions are carried out. These lavish weddings are recognized by their rich decor. REd and gold decorate the bride, groom, and the space to symbolize success, livelihood, and happiness.
Let’s start with the basics! What should you wear to a traditional chinese wedding? Wearing red is a no, no, while darker hues are also avoided for their somber symbolism. It is best to attend a traditional chinese wedding in warm purples, peaches, and pinks as they symbolize new life and happiness. Much like you wouldn’t wear white to a western wedding, red is reserved for the couple!
You might then ask, what do I gift at a chinese wedding? The traditional answer is the red envelope. Chinese couples don’t sign up for a gift registry, instead it is customary that guests bring red envelopes with money. It is important that the sum of money is even, and often best luck if it includes an 8! Do not fill the envelope with odd sums, or with 4’s as this may symbolize the death of the relationship. If you’re questioning your gift, check into chinese symbolism and tradition! It’s an important part of their culture, and therefore a big part of wedding tradition.
Like most weddings, the process begins with the proposal. For chinese grooms the Guo Da Li is an important betrothal tradition in which gifts are given to the bride’s family as a formal proposal. Each gift will carry symbolism of good fortune and prosperity. If the bride’s parents accept, half of the gifts will be returned to the groom to show their interest in holding a good relationship with the groom’s family.
Time to set a date! The date holds more significance for a chinese couple. Some even turn to fortune tellers for guidance. THe date is chosen using the bride’s birthdate in mind to select the best date to marry ensuring good fortune for the couple.
Red is clearly a color of importance to the chinese culture, and the marriage bed is no exception. This unique custom is performed by a female relative of good fortune, having lots of family and children. This family member will dress the bed in a red color, and add dried fruits and other small gifts to symbolize fertility and a sweet long lasting marriage. The bed is to be dressed 2-3 days prior to the wedding, and is left untouched until the couple returns from their wedding.
Some couples may also partake in a hair combing ceremony. In this situation, the bride and groom will sit back to back with the bride facing a mirror or window. A woman of good fortune will prepare and perform the ceremony. Using cypress leaves, scissors, a comb, and some other supplies. A prayer is read for each stroke of the hair, and when the four prayers are recited a red yarn with cypress leave is cut ending the ceremony.
The procession of the bride has long been an important tradition, but some couples are taming down this ceremony as they plan their modern Chinese wedding. A traditional procession may include firecrackers, drums, and even dancers. Typically a child will walk out in front of the procession alongside the groom to symbolize fertility in their marriage.
My favorite tradition is Chuangmen, or “door games” that the bridal party uses to test the groom's love for the bride. The bridesmaid will organize a series of tests for the groom to complete upon arrival at the bride’s door. Oftentimes they might check the groom’s knowledge of the bride, or give him a painful task. Other tests include eating something spicy, sweet, sour, and bitter to prepare him for the stages of marriage. Once the groom completes these tasks he will present the bridal party with a red envelope of money as a final offering to the bride’s friends. Once the bridesmaids allow the groom to enter the bridal suite his final test is to find the bride's missing shoe and place it on her foot before heading out for a tea party! This tradition seems like so much fun, and was a favorite to learn about!
The Chinese Tea Ceremony is an important part of the chinese wedding. During the tea ceremony the bride and groom show gratitude to their parents. The couples will kneel before their parents to offer tea in thanks for their love and support in raising them. The groom’s family will drink the tea first followed by the bride's family, and once everyone has taken a sip the couple is offered a red envelope of money or gold jewelry to bless the union. Following this the couple will serve tea to the paternal family in birth order, followed by the maternal family is birth order.
What we consider the “wedding” in the western world is the celebration of the exchange of the vows. Some couples opt for the big wedding, while others simply stand in front of the family altar to honor their ancestors. Another option is to exchange their vows at a courthouse, just like so many American couples!
The wedding banquet is where the cultural party comes to life. When we think of the lavish chinese wedding, it’s the banquets that come to mind. With eight courses of amazing food, this big traditional party is hosted by the couples parents. The menu is long, and each item is symbolic of a successful relationship for the bride and groom. During the banquet is when most brides will change into the traditional red wedding dress, or a qipao. During the banquet the families will share a slideshow of the bride and groom throughout their childhood, which is such a personal touch!
The celebration continues as the couple travels to the bride's family three days after the big day. The bride is no longer considered family, but her parents will welcome them into the home with a mini banquet, and the groom brings a roasted pig as a gift for the family.
Fashion of course is our favorite part about weddings around the world! Chinese brides get lucky, as they often wear multiple dresses throughout the wedding. Many choose to wear the western white dress for their vow exchange and then change into their traditional red dress for their banquet. Throughout the reception the bride may choose to change into other formal outfits.
For more Chinese wedding inspiration, check us out on Pinterest!